Why didn't I concur?

So, I wanted to write down my recent adventures in check fraud, because that seems fun.  I think this would be best explained with the text conversation:

Mysterious Friend: Hi, Do you still have Upright Piano available for sale?
Me: Yes indeed
Mysterious Friend: I will be paying with check, and have my picker come for the pickup cos presently not in state..  [at this point I started to be suspicious, it only took 2 texts]
Me: Ok, do you definitely want it then?
Mysterious Friend: Yeah, But i will need some information to mail the check out
Me: Hm, you can imagine I'm just a little wary of giving m piano away to someone while I'm waiting for a check from another state.  Do you have PayPal, or some other way to transfer the money?  Alternatively, i could just hold onto the piano until I get the check.
Mysterious Friend: You will hold the piano till you get the check and clear it..  [that seemed awfully bossy, but whatever
Me: Cool, I can do that.  You want my address? I can mark it as sold.
Mysterious Customer: I need you [so tender] Full Name: address: city: state: zip code [I see you're a fan of the colon]
Me: My address [In retrospect, perhaps giving my address to suspicious people isn't the best idea, but such is the nature of KSL classifieds.
Mysterious Customer: How am i paying and i will want you to consider it sold
Me: Well, PayPal would be best, but if you can't, I can take a check, made out and sent to me.  It's $300
Mysterious Customer: Okay, I will get back to you with the tracking number as soon as the check is mail out to you
Me: Cool thanks, I'll mark it as sold.
Mysterious Customer: Alright Thanks you so much.

A couple days pass....

Mysterious Customer: Good Morning, how are you doing I just want to update you regarding the check.. It will be mail out today.. Am sorry for the delay.
Me: No problem, thanks for the update.  I'll let you know when it rrives and depoited and you can come get your piano.  Have a good day!

another few days

Mysterious Customer: Good Morning, I am really sorry for the delay in the check but it ave been mail out this morning with USPS courier with USPS tracking
Me:     [I was busy with life, I didn't get back to him within 24 hours]

Mysterious Customer: Hello, You never get back to me to know if you get the tracking number correctly or not
Me: Hey, sorry!  I hadn't gotten around to checking.  I just looked, it's working.  Thanks.  I'll let you know when I get it.

-time passes, next day I check the tracking number and it says it's out for delivery.  Excited, I go to check my mail and see, to my elation, a usps envelope.  I anxiously tear it open, excited for my $300 and liberation from this blasted piano and see, to my surprise, a check for $1970.

Does it still count at 6 figures if two of the figures are cents?

At first I assumed there must be some mistake, maybe this was a different check that was for some scholarship I was waiting for (I'm not) or something along those lines.  But no, it was clearly the right check, the tracking number matched up and everything.  At this point I was pretty suspicious, but I didn't see how this could go poorly for me, after all, it wasn't my money, even if it were a scam, I didn't see the end game.   It seemed like a really bad scam that gives me a free $1700 at the expense of some chinese christians.  So I texted him:

Me: So the check arrived today, but you overpaid by about $1700, was that intentional?
"Joseph Mark":  <no response>

I assume this must be a pretty critical point in the check cashing scheme, since obviously people will be suspicious, and they're holding all the cards.  I could just cash the check and keep it.  That would be fun.  It would take skill and great tact, rhetoric even, to calm my suspicious, and convince me to hand over all that money.  Luckily, today "Joseph" broke out his persuasive hat:

sent at 5:36 AM the day after (today)
"Joseph Mark": Hi, Sorry for my late update..have been very busy, [I don't understand the double period, is it supposed to be some sort of mini elipses?] i just confirm the check ave been delivered to you, i'll want you to go ahead and deposit the check and it will clear ur acct after 24hr and deduct ur asking price with addition $50 for holding d item down for me and the rest will be send to my picker.

So at this point, I have a lot of questions.  What is a picker anyway?  This is obviously a fraud, so what should I do now?  Also, when trying to defraud a christian mission of $2000, is the extra $50 convenience fee really effective?  I was totally going to call the cops, but he threw in an extra $50.  I should have bartered with him: "Look you're obviously trying to scam some mission, but split the check 50/50 and I won't even make you pretend to pick up the piano.".  Sadly, things played out as follows:

8:40 "Joseph Mark": Good Morning, Did you get my text?   [Ironically, this text saved me from being late for work, since I had somehow not woken up with my alarm or something.  It was a strange blessing from a criminal, but since I was already running late and not sure how to respond, I didn't yet]

He called at about 10, my phone was off

11:57 "Joseph Mark": Why are you not picking my call? [I do somewhat regret never having talked to him in person, I'm curious to know what he sounds like.  Is he intelligent, illiterate, asian? I'll never know.]
Me: Sorry, work until later this afternoon, I'll get back to you. [I was at work, but I also wasn't sure what to do.  I didn't want him to get spooked and run off and miss my chance at an elaborate sting operation]
"Joseph Mark": Did you have the check deposited?
Me: Not yet, I didn't have time before the bank closed yesterday [that's true], today might not happen, tomorrow I should have time to take care of it if I don't today [that's also true, although by take care of it I meant go to wells fargo and the police for advice, and possible sting operation planning]
"Joseph Mark": Oh... I guess if you can get the check deposit today and the money will be available on your account tomorrow so my mover can come by
Me: Yeah, I'll see what I can do, but if not, I'm free next week, just whenever works for him.  [see how I draw him in, making me sound less suspicious]
"Joseph Mark": Or should I provide you the mover information to have the rest funds send to him cos he ave some other items to pick for me somewhere else... So he can continue with that and you cash the check at any available time of yours   [This just seems desperate.  I obviously wasn't going to send money to the mover before the check cleared, and now it sounds like I was expected to send the money to the mover, which meant he wouldn't even take the piano.  That was the whole point!  I did, however, notice that he's mastered the three dot ellipsis. ]
Me: Well, I'll have to get the money before I could send it to him.  I don't have $1700 just lieing [sic] around. By the way, is he going to bring people?  It's a heavy piano, I don't think he'll be able to do it alone
Me: But yeah, if I have time I'd like to take care of it today, I'm tired of the piano taking up space, and I could use the money   [again, reeling him in...]
"Joseph Mark": Sure, he will come with is worker... Just try and get the check deposit today... So you can have the money in your account soon... It won't take you more then 10min to do that.  [a little pushy there at the end, but now that he's mastered the ellipsis he's really going to town.  He sounds downright reticent]
Me: Yeah, I'll let you know when it's done
"Joseph Mark": Thank for the understanding  [only one thank.  That's harsh]

So at this point i swung by the bank and told them, they confirmed that it was a fraud, but didn't seem too keen on the elaborate heist.  I happened to have left the check at home, so after work my roommate and I went by the police station and told them.  They also weren't too excited for the heist (having already tried) but appreciated the information and that I hadn't cashed the check.  They took my number, the check and the envelope and filed it away.  Apparently there's been a bunch of KSL check fraud recently, the lady at the counter next to me happened to have had the same thing happen, as had a friend of a friend of mine.

At this point, I wanted to choose my words carefully.  Obviously I had to tell him the check didn't clear, but I didn't want to lose my opportunity to mess with a criminal.  Also the package was sent from detroit, and he had my full name and address and phone number, so I didn't want to mess with him to the point that he wanted to retaliate.  I chose my words judiciously to say the least:

Me: Hey, so I went to the bank, but they wouldn't cash the check.  [this is true. First of all, they're on the lookout for this sort of thing right now, but I also told them the whole situation from the start, which had a lot to do with their refusal to cashing the check.]  But I have wells Fargo also, do you want to just transfer me the money through wells Fargo?  It's free, and we wouldn't have to wait for postage.  Then your guy could come pick up the piano.
"Joseph Mark": <no response...>

So that's where we're at.  I don't expect him to respond.  I should have gone for the gold and asked to be in on future scams, or just made fun of him.  I suppose I still could.  Or you could, I have his phone number after all.

I've learned a lot in this ordeal.  First it takes a long time to transcribe an entire text conversation to blogger.  Second, criminals are dumb, and must think other people are really really dumb, which to a certain extent they must be, since obviously this is working enough to keep trying.  Third, I would make a much better criminal.  I would just buy something small with nearly the exact value of the check, pay for it, and then resell it elsewhere.  I think it would be a much more successful scam.  Although it might require actual interaction, which I suppose comes with a lot more risk.  I'll probably just stick to legitimate enterprises.